Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Appreciating Holding Hands - Point to Ponder

Many of us take things for granted, specially when it comes to honour the efforts of parents to raise their children. In fact many grown up children have been observed saying that whatever their parents have doe was their duty and that they have done no 'favour' by raising them and claim their 'entitlement' to all privileges and comforts. 

Well to an extent it is true too - but the limits and barriers their parents cross can never be appreciated by the children unless they themselves become parents and start to realize that one can make a choice as parents too - just provide normal livelihood to children and let them grow on their own or go out of the way to ensure the best of the best so that they grow up and prosper, despite the personal discomfort of the parents.

I have seen a few single parents, who after the death of their husbands have put in their heart and soul to bring up their children when they had a chance to re-marry and enjoy companionship of their second husbands and wives. And in doing so, I have seen them enduring hardships that only parents could endure. And luckily, their children reciprocated and appreciated the sacrifices of their single parents and are still grateful. But there are many whose both parents are alive, but their children after growing up just walk away abandoning them and forgetting to appreciate their sacrifices and efforts to brighten up their future.

For such children who do not appreciate their parents, efforts to raise them, here is an eye opening story one must read till the end. I came across this story on Facebook and thought of sharing it with my readers for it has lessons for many of us:

One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?"
The youth answered "none".

The director asked, "Was it your father who paid for your school fees?"
The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, "Where did your mother work?"
The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner.

The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, "Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?"
The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.”

The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.”

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.


The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother's hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.

The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: "Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, "I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'

The Director asked, "please tell me your feelings."

The youth said:
Number 1,I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not the successful me today.
Number 2,By working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.
Number 3,I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.
The director said, "This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality “and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?

You can let your kid live in a big house, give him a Driver driven car for going around, Eat a Good Meal, learn Piano, Watch a Big Screen TV. But when you are Cutting Grass, please let them experience it. After a Meal, let them Wash their Plates and Bowls together with their Brothers and Sisters. Tell them to Travel in Public Bus, It is not because you do not have Money for Car or to hire a Maid, but it is because you want to Love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will Grow Grey, same as the Mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.

The story shared by Khalid Naeemuddin on Facebook


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